Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Mis-meetings of the minds

My parents are Scottish... like real kilt wearing, hard to understand, my cousin and godfather play the bagpipes kind of Scottish. My mother raised my brothers and I as she was raised, and it wasn't really until college, when I met people from all different walks of life, that I realized how differently people acted in situations.

The first ever realization that my up-bringing might be different than another persons was at a dinner party. I was taught the "proper" way to use a knife and fork, and that is what I thought everyone did. However, the person sitting directly across from me ate VERY differently than I did. He stabbed his meat with his fork in full-fist grip and proceeded to saw the meat, scratching his knife repeatedly on the plate. Then, once the piece was cut, he *gasp* changed his fork from his left hand to his right hand, and ate the piece. My first thought: heathen. It was at that point that I began to notice things that I was taught to do in social situations that not everyone did.. at first I was put off by the lack of "manners" that people had, but eventually I realized that some people did not act the same way I did because of their up bringing, not because they were rude.

I still do the things that my mother taught me.... if no one is talking in a social circle, one must find something... ANYTHING to start a conversation about.. one must sit with her ankles crossed under the table, not legs crossed, in polite circles... one must always have biscuits (cookies) and some form of refreshment when a guest comes to call.. etc etc... however my version of things is tamer than hers (don't tell my mom that though!)

When I do have cultural clashes with people, I still get put off.. however since the realization at the dinner party, I do not hold it against people. I find other cultures interesting, and try my best to take note of customs and try to appropriately incorporate them into interactions. However, I am sure that somewhere along the road, someone has thought my constant talking through silences was pretty annoying..

1 comment:

  1. I am excited to see that someone else in this world was taught how to use a knife and fork. I remember the first time I saw someone stabbing their meat with the knife and sawing it in half like they were a cave man, definitely not a pretty sight. It was so surprising to me because it had been drilled into my mind that no one that is sane would do that.

    Props to you Cat!

    ReplyDelete